February 02, 2012

Will Someday Rise Again


Still I Rise

You may write me down in history
With your bitter, twisted lies,
You may trod me in the very dirt
But still, like dust, I'll rise.

Does my sassiness upset you?
Why are you beset with gloom?
'Cause I walk like I've got oil wells
Pumping in my living room.

Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I'll rise.

Did you want to see me broken?
Bowed head and lowered eyes?
Shoulders falling down like teardrops.
Weakened by my soulful cries.

Does my haughtiness offend you?
Don't you take it awful hard
'Cause I laugh like I've got gold mines
Diggin' in my own back yard.

You may shoot me with your words,
You may cut me with your eyes,
You may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I'll rise.

Does my sexiness upset you?
Does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I've got diamonds
At the meeting of my thighs?

Out of the huts of history's shame
I rise
Up from a past that's rooted in pain
I rise
I'm a black ocean, leaping and wide,
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.

Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that's wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,
I am the dream and the hope of the slave.
I rise
I rise
I rise.

- By M aya Angelou

Colors

Grey… were the clouds

that hovered across the sky

yesterday

while rains pummelled

on the window panes

midst the cream-washed walls

of this shell

encasing me;

and brown were the pitter-patters

of little feet

outside

gently enveloping me

in a daze

of blue and pink and yellow

swirls

to match

magenta tinge of lilacs

serenading reds and blacks

and stronger hues

of golden daffodils

like soft kisses

of brilliant

fuchshia-winged butterflies

caressing me

with the sweet minty smell

of a baby’s rosy breath

and orange chuckle

to touch the verdant grass

which seem so far

out of my grasp

today.

I wait then

for when

I can taste

and hear and feel

and smell

tomorrow’s

pot of gold

or silver

or platinum

around the bend

where lies

the rainbow’s end.

January 31, 2012

Connected

wow, was ecstatic to finally link with friends again after a while. it's been some time since i opened the net and was so glad to read mails/messages from friends. iba talaga ang nagagawa ng push galing sa mga kaibigan. :-)

have to get my life on track. let's see- have to:
-update my resume
-draft some applications
-polish on those technical what's-and-how's for interviews (just in case)
-trim down to size ehem
-practice driving
-stick to my daily discipline
phewwww! like i've said before, i'm back to square one and joining the rat-race once again.

huh, good luck to me!

January 08, 2012

New Year, New Hope

it's the feast of the epiphany.

i can only offer a prayer of hope for my kababayans. Monsignor's homily hit me hard. and here i am feeling all hopeless and sad for the plight of so many here back home.

have been too distressed over what happened just weeks ago. 'twas the saddest Christmas ever in our community. i had long wanted to write about it but words just won't come. my heart was too crushed over the sorry sights in our place everywhere.

many relatives were still reeling from the floods. some sustained wounds from banging/crushing their feet trying to get out of the ceiling with the muddy waters rising a foot a minute inside their homes. their doors could not be opened due to the pressure of the raging waters outside hence they were trapped inside. a lot of the friends and neighbors we know perished this way- trapped inside their houses! an aunt died, her mother still missing until now; my mom's friend was washed up on the river but alas 5 grandchildren died,with her husband and 1 more granddaughter still missing. theirs were the grief-stricken faces that have been posted and re-posted on facebook countless times.- that of a father carrying his child, and his two sisters on the background wailing for their own dead children alongside him. some more aunts and uncles fought their way to get out of their homes (breaking glass doors/ crushing the ceiling with their hands and feet) and staying on the rooftop until the early morning hours when daybreak came and the waters have receded to waist-deep height. my own brother barely managed to help his friend's family get out of Orchids village before the waters inundated their home along with Bayug island just a few meters across it.

my kuya's family and i arrived days after what happened. but the gloom and sadness was so foreboding, it was heart-wrenching. my relatives took up camp along the roadside near their homes along with many others in the neighborhood. not many went to the camps/relocation areas. not when they have friends and relatives willing to help them recover. and yes, they never received any of the donations that were supposed to have come. the local government will not give to those not staying in the camps/relocation sites. what stupidity! these people who saw fit not to join the already over-crowded centers still deserve to receive their share. a lot of mattresses were donated but these were not given to those not in the camps. wtf?!! the people who did not go there still needed those beds, still needed food, still needed clothing. and because of that, these people have their spirits even more crushed. because a lot of them did not get the proper help from their own local government. the mayor's wife often get shouted at and rejected out of the affected areas as stories started spreading about how she would act high and mighty demanding private donations by civil groups to be centralized in the city centers.

after days of meeting with the city council on the needs of the people in the affected areas and getting frustrated over the inaction and mere lipservice, our parish priest started encouraging those who were willing to help to just go directly to the areas and do their outreach. and all the better. otherwise, the people would have waited in vain. they needed help immediately, and they did not get it. how can local government not release funds at such a crucial time as this? a calamity fund has been accorded to the city but all over the place you can hear people complaining and asking where it was. city officials, have you really been looking after your people's plight? why then is it easier for you to release funds during campaign period than during a calamity when your constituents gravely needed it?

this has been cleaned by Christmas time but alas, so few came for the Eucharistic celebration. on the early morning of Dec 25th, we went to church early but what we were told to be 6am mass became a 7am mass. what usually is teeming with chattering and joyful faces of old folks and children alike on any given Sunday was then the saddest face of Christmass i've ever seen. yes, too few came. i was doing the first reading and as i read the verses assigned to me, i felt saddened by the gloomy faces before me.

below are pics near the bridge. houses have been swept away. look at the debris and giant logs that lodged anywhere thereafter.


here are pics of Orchids Village just a few hundred meters from our place.
hills of mud like this were bulldozed from the roads in Orchid village so that it can be passable once again.

across Orchids is Bayug island, or what's left of it.

on this sight was once a hanging bridge leading to Bayug island. now it has been swept away by the waters. those who want to go the main island now rides on a small banca or raft like this.


December 18, 2011

Saddened by Sendong

not too happy since yesterday. am feeling distressed with news about Sendong.


Prayer for Those Who Suffer

For those who suffer,
and those who cry this night,
give them repose, Lord;
a pause in their burdens
Let there be minutes
where they experience peace,
not of man but of angels.
Love them, Lord, when others cannot.
Hold them, Lord, when we fail with human arms.
Heal their prayers
and give them the ability to hear you back
in whatever language they best understand.
Amen.

December 04, 2011

2nd Sunday of Advent

woke up to a rainy Sunday morning. took a bath and went to hear mass at the clubhouse. it's already the second Sunday of Advent. and still in consonance with the Advent readings, today's sermon is about our personal preparation for the Lord's coming- filling in of the uneven roads in our life (making up for what we lack / omissions), making straight the path (giving up vices, admitting our wrongs), levelling the mountains into plains (humbling ourselves, putting out our pride), basically stop sinning or trying our level best not to commit to sin anymore. Father was reminding us about the coming Simbang Gabi and how the clusters are gonna be handling the mass sponsorship.

stopped by the grocery and bought tinapay and cookies. just got back home and cooked breakfast. had a hearty meal of daing, corned beef and scrambled eggs. ang sarap kumain pag umuulan. and the daing smelled of dried pusit. this came from indonesia, one of their delicacies. sarap, ang lutong!

November 15, 2011

November's Here


kuya had his bday at home last week. he just turned 40. and that's when life begins....

and mommy will be celebrating her birthday in a couple of days. may God bless you both and may He continue to love you and hold you in His warm loving embrace. love you both!