"Forgiveness is not the misguided act of condoning irresponsible, hurtful behavior. Nor is it a superficial turning of the other cheek that leaves us feeling victimized and martyred. Rather it is the finishing of old business that allows us to experience the present, free of contamination from the past." --- Joan Borysenko, Ph.D., Fire In The Soul
I salute my boss who embraced our decision to leave, well, maybe not with her whole heart, but who opened up to the possibility that we can still work on having better lives elsewhere. and i thank her for her good wishes. i felt that her heart understood what my heart was trying to tell her.
this past week, i've been getting questions as to why i decided to leave. and some even hinting that my act was quite hurtful to my boss and all the others i'd be leaving behind. it seems unthinkable to most people in the plant that i will want to leave given that i have just been promoted and i hold some key role in initiating improvements in the quality and food safety systems in our company.
what pains me is learning that some people would make a jab at my decision to seek personal growth elsewhere. i believe we all have a right to think and decide for ourselves on what we may deem to be our best chance at a good life and give it our best shot. and the least that anyone can do really is be a well-wisher to us in our quest for a better life. and i expected that much from my friends. i do not need the cold shoulder, or the cold treatment. i can forgive such acts, though. and i have tried to really stretch my understanding on why this came about. how i wish i understand. because i want to start anew. and i would rather that there are no ill feelings from peers on the decision i've made. well, we can not please everyone. i have given ten and a half years of service to the company. and i'm proud to say i gave my best in those ten years.
i can handle the quiet support. oh yes, i do appreciate the light tap on the shoulder. and i was surprised that there's been quite an unexpected number of them. thank you all from the bottom of my heart!
im also grateful that even MJ the director accepted my saying that i would like to look back in my old age knowing that i learned the answer to the 'what could have beens?' in my life. despite her saying that it's quite a waste seeing that i've invested a lot already in my work here. she calmly accepted my farewell and wished me a good life.
i do not want to grow old wondering of the 'what might be's" just because i did not even attempt. i want to live a life without regrets. i may stumble and fall, but i know i have more than enough inspiration from the Lord, my family and friends to will myself up and rise again. i will move forward after each fall, after each loss, after each failure. as they say and i quote, "The biggest gap in the world is the one between "I should" and "I did".
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